Just this.

The world is feeling so very hopeless to me.  Photograph after photograph of Syrian refugees are plastered on my screens.  Each one that I see my heart falls out of myself and I have to shove it back in.

And also there have been fires in the fireplace on these cold and stormy nights.

There was a recent trip to Vancouver, BC with some amazing food in the mix.

We have been honoring our beloved dead this month and behind the scenes we are preparing for next holidays.

And then my heart falls out of me again.

The suffering of the world.  The suffering of friends.

I put my heart back in and remind myself that I am alive.

And, I am in a small way responsible for doing something to contribute to the world.

The house is also a mess.

I want to make some cookie dough to freeze. 

The baby won't nap.

The laundry is high.

And my period is so so awful.

And I have so much privlege: job and health and days and housing and joy and energy to do some inner work (and whiteness and Americanness and hetero-normativity)..so much privilege.

We need a new dresser. The one we have repaired 25 times has died on us.

We also need a vacuum.

And I need more sleep than I am getting.

And all of this.

All of this.