February 13...I love when I find my parenting groove.

Junia is still sleeping in a crib and we are going to leave it that way for awhile more.  She is sleeping really well, not trying to escape and its working for us.  Rule number #1 of parenting- if it is working then don't change it.

The problem is that she has outgrown her blankets.  They technically fit over her but only if they aren't bunched or gathered and if she doesn't move.  On the other hand a twin blanket is just too much blanket for a crib.  So thus, Junia and I went to Jo-Anne's yesterday to buy some fleece for a new blanket.

So there we are in the fleece aisle...getting along perfectly well...and she picked out the Disney princess fleece. I turned around and she said, "I want this one." I exclaimed, "oh no freakin' way."  And yes, I exclaimed it.  She of course burst into tears at my strong response.

But then I have to give this kid a reason that the Disney princess blanket will not be crossing the threshold of our house (I don't think she even knows a single Disney princess). I picked up my crying kid and here's what I came up with.

"Junia we aren't going to get a blanket with other people's faces on it.  We don't want them in our house.  Unless we find a blanket with your picture on it we don't get blankets with other people's faces."  So we looked for a blanket with her face on it- and ended up with some orange fleece and some ribbon to decorate the edges a bit.

I actually kind of like coming up with explanations like this.  Especially when she buys them!

February 12...I love Southern California

I hadn't ever been until last fall.  Southern California was a mysterious place that in my imagination were scenes from 90210 or Baywatch. Superficial. Sunbathed, Beach, Hollywood, Disney, Fake= These are not things I am into whatsoever.  But Sean went down to San Diego for work last fall and last spring we were craving some sunshine.

So over the slow course of time I have realized how much I like it.  Like every place the stereotypes have some truth.  I mean NYorkers are cold at first and Seattlelites are all wearing tan or fleece and kind of downers, and San Franciscans are elitist and zealously liberal---but a cities are full of people with lots of opinions perspectives bodies. Cities are full of neighborhoods, exceptions, chaos, history and culture.  So of course, this is true of Southern California.

I had to go down to San Diego for a funeral yesterday.  It was work related and of course I would have preferred not to go.  But while there I was on a mission to absorb sunshine, gawk at growing things, sight the ocean, and be in a place that I am finding newly charming.


I don't really want to live there...and I confess I'm not sure I LOVE southern California but I have a crush for sure.

February 9....I love PDA

Today, riding the bus to work, a 40+ year old man dressed in jeans and a collared shirt, looking ever so ordinary boarded. But just before he did a blew a kiss to someone.  No hand just puckered lips and eye contact.

Watching him, I felt priveleged to know that he loved someone. And, he loved someone enough to express that love in public.  It was pretty cool.

I think the kind of PDA that bothers me is when it is highly sexualized.  When people are clearly horn-balls for one another (I get it but I don't like it); or when couples are rude- getting in the way of others, making a scene that kind of stuff.

But when people are gently expressing love.
When they are putting their affection out there in the world.
It can sometimes be charming...and sure sometimes akward but I'm not going to move away from uncomfortable just because love is out on the table.

So thanks man on the bus.  I want to hold my beloved's hand right now.

February 6...I love a finished project

I love a finished project.

Like this one.

This must be why today I finished two quilts.
1 clock.
And made a cute skirt for the toddler on a whim.
It's the high of completion that I love.

Oh, and about this dresser!?

This dresser started out as a $75 craigslist deal.  Ikea doesn't even make them anymore.  But this one was around $200 when they did.  So it felt like a good deal...no going to Ikea, no putting it together, no fighting over instructions.  Phew.

With some primer. And three coats of sample paint this has turned into a beaut!

Oh how I love the ombre effect.  And that this one has room for toddler clothes and baby clothes.

Here are some steps along the way:

•  Took off the handles and filled in one of the holes.  Then sanded then
• Then primed the face and edge of the drawers with Olympic brand primer- the only primer at Lowes that didn't have a pregnant women label.
• I actually then did three coats of paint letting each coat dry for at least 10 hours
• But since we only have 1 paintbrush the whole thing took over a week.
• But it worked out, Junia would go to bed and I could easily spend 10 minutes painting the drawer and then not worry about her touching them in the AM.
• The paint colors are valspar. I picked an orange paint sample and asked for 1 sample of each.  

Feb 4. I love....how my daughter eats

Junia is a great eater.

She is sometimes picky.
She sometimes has preferences.
She sometimes gets more calories from milk than meals.

The photo is taken from the restaurant website here: http://www.vijsrangoli.ca/diner/index.html

But, for the most part she is willing to try a lot of things.  We are in Vancouver, BC for the night. We had hotel points for a free room and we needed to get away.  So tonight we went to our favorite resturant in Vancouver this place: http://www.vijsrangoli.ca/diner/index.html.  It's not kid friendly.  It's really not toddler friendly.  But it's so good.

It's an Indian restaurant: some spicy things, some fruity things, but generally not our American fare.  And of course Junia joined along. Eating a relatively spicy dal (and drinking plenty of water), enjoying the saffron rice loaded with vegetables, and getting bits of tandoor chicken with a curry sauce on it stuck in her teeth.

I imagine it is a mix of her personality and the fact that we don't force her to eat but also don't give her options (eat what we are eating or load up on milk) that has made her quite an adventurous eater. It's just so stinkin' cool to see her eat things that I didn't have until I was in my twenties and to enjoy them so thoroughly.

Tomorrow's food adventure?  Chinese soup dumplings!

February 3....I love

Last February I joined this community of bloggers who posted a "I love" series during the month of February.  One of my self protective styles is to remember the chaos or to laugh at the sloppy I kind of like the messiness of life.    I also think it is good practice for me to periodically embrace the sweetness, beauty and joy that can be at right at the surface of our living as well...even if that isn't the most natural way of being for me.

So today I start with I love Junia's relationship with her sibling.

Sure her sibling is a fetus, that Junia calls "baby sister" (who knows if she is a she), but the relationship that they seem to be starting is already pretty cool.

Last night I had to go back to work after dinner and Junia gave me a hug and kiss goodbye and then she voluntarily gave "baby sister" a hug and kiss goodbye as well.  It was pretty cool.  And even though they will certianly have a dynamic beginning (especially at first) I think that watching your children become and be siblings is going to be a very cool thingl

Sick of being Sick

On Tuesday Sean and I picked Junia up from daycare and realized she wasn't breathing very well.  So after a quick stop at a grocery store dei we spent ourlovely Tuesday evening at Seattle Children's Hospital urgent care. 

They patched her up and sent us home around 11pm.  I am convinced that some researcher needs to inquire about the passing of time in healthcare settings.  It is somehow altogether different, "quick hurry up and wait."

It seems that Sean and I are constantly living in fear and dread about the next time Junia will be sick.  In January alone I had to take 4 sick days.  And, in the world of no paid maternity leave this means that each of these days means one less day of leave for baby Deuce.    So maybe that makes me thankful that I have been working so many hours on the weekends. Because then, at least it all adds up to be even.

Phew.

At moments I think she is an unusually sick kid.  But maybe its just the fine art of being a two year old.  Being two, being in daycare= being sick (and yes building up that immune system).

All in all though, I am jonesing for some healthy weeks! Some springtime boost in our immune systems!

Simply 3 hours of alone time.

Should I hang up bunting?  That's how exciting this is!

I have an overnight retreat tonight at work.

This means that I'm going in late.
 This also means that we still took Junia to daycare and Sean still went to work because I am still going into work.

So what then is this wierd void? Alone time in my house?  Praise the Lord we don't live in community! Or live in a house with 10 other relatives. Or have roommates. Or any of the other sort of mixes that happen in households.  Because I am getting some legit alone time here.

Much to my surprise I am happy to leave the pile of laundry on the living room floor.
Or a gift baby quilt on the sewing machine.
or the kitchen piled with dishes.

Rather, I am going to take my journal.
And a novel I am trying to finish reading.
and another book I am working through down to the neighborhood bakery.
I am going to order a latte.
Two pastries.

And I am going to sit until I start to think about other things.

And, wouldn't you know it today is even sunny.

Prayer for Peace- and curiosity

Yesterday I prayed this prayer at an inter-faith prayer for peace.  I was invited explicitly as a Roman Catholic lay minister and was expected/invited to pray from that perspective.  I found it deeply challenging to speak from my perspective as a liberal feminist lay Roman Catholic but also I didn't want to add layers of confusion to anyone who wasn't familiar with diversity within the Catholic tradition.

As you can read, or pray, or find, I didn't push at all with gender language or reinterpretation in a challenging way.  But I feel like I was authentic and moreover- I really am coming to believe that curiosity about one another might be a real source of bringing people together.

Lord God,


You are ever curious about all people.



As the gospels share,

in your living on earth you were always wanting to take in those around you for who they were.



When you met the sick, or ostracized.

When you met the oppressed or unknown.

When you met minorities or the unwelcome

Even when you met the powerful and elite.



You took the time to sit.
To welcome.

To talk.

To know people.



In the spirit of your curiosity about people of all kinds

May we become like you.

Embracing others out of a deep desire to know them.

To understand.

To move away from our preconceived notions.

And to become people of peace.



In the spirit of taking risks to be with people

May our gathering today inspire future conversations.

Depth of understanding

Richness in friendship.



In the spirit of your living, dying and rising

May we become people

Committed to love.

Prophetic in word.

Authentic in our striving for peace.



We ask this through Christ our Lord. Amen.


-Written by Rachel Doll O'Mahoney

Why the Visitation of Mary isn't working for me...

In prayer this morning our leader had chosen "the visitation" or where Mary visits Elizabeth to reflect on and frankly it pissed me off.


http://artsandfaith.com/index.php?showtopic=20124



Mary Visits Elizabeth.

During those days Mary set out and traveled to the hill country in haste to a town of Judah, where she entered the house of Zechariah and greeted Elizabeth. When Elizabeth heard Mary’s greeting, the infant leaped in her womb, and Elizabeth, filled with the holy Spirit,^s cried out in a loud voice and said, “Most blessed are you among women, and blessed is the fruit of your womb.^t And how does this happen to me, that the mother of my Lord^* should come to me? For at the moment the sound of your greeting reached my ears, the infant in my womb leaped for joy. Blessed are you who believed^* that what was spoken to you by the Lord would be fulfilled.” (from tnew New American Bible- copied from teh USCCB website http://www.usccb.org/bible/luke/1)

So I've been thinking about this reading today.  Thinking about how for a lot of Catholics this is a week filled with zeal about the right to life protests and I got pissed.  Maybe I am sick of fetus' having such a loud voice in my tradition when I feel like often women have no voice at all...



http://www.heqigallery.com/gallery/gallery3/pages/3-TheVisitation.html



The person with the most power in the whole story is a fetus, a freakin' fetus. Sure a much beloved and prophetic fetus but hi movement is what validates Elizabeth's words.  Let me just tell you- that as I write this, as I have been thinking about this, as I prayed with this, my 27 week old fetus has been "leaping" all over my womb.  Because, frankly that is what fetus' do.



I am frustrated that Elizabeth cannot stand on her own authority. That her voice has to be validated by John.  I am frustrated because so many women I love and know believe that their voices must be validated by others.  I find this heartbreaking...

How many women believe their self worth is validated by men?

Or their proof that they are good parents is their children?

Or their belief in the beauty of their bodies is validated by superficial constructs of beauty?

I want Elizabeth to say..."Mary my sister and friend who is visiting me...you are  blessed are you among women, and blessed is the fruit of your womb." And then I want them to sit down as pregnant women do an gripe about being uncomfortable and swoon about the work that their bodies are doing. I want Elizabeth to share with Mary that since her arrival the baby has been moving at the sound of her voice...and how profound that seems to her.

But I want Elizabeth's voice to be one of strength. I dream that for her.