Where are we going. What do we wish?

Facebook informed me this week that we have lived in this house for 3 years.  That means we have lived on Vashon Island for 4 years.  It also means we have lived in the PNW for nearly 8 years.  On one hand that seems right. On the other hand that is about as long as we have been parenting.  It seems like we went from living the free live as graduate students and then directly into parenting.   (which isn't exactly true)  Having lived through various stages of Seattle's affordability I do feel like we have been here awhile. . . the 8 years have been dynamic.

As you have probably garnered from a handful of other posts it has been a rough year for the DollO's.  Sean and I both have a habit of turning to the fantasy of moving when things get rough.  It's what we do.  Maybe it's no coincidence that 4 years after living in Seattle we moved to Vashon.  Now 4 years on Vashon we are dreaming elsewhere...

Who knows that will become of this dreaming. We might stay. We might go. We might switch jobs. We might not.  We are feeling fluid around the whole thing.  The fact of the matter is that we aren't as fluid as we feel. We have 3 kids, a house, stable jobs, and are slowly growing friendships (and do NOT want to start over).  Moving is an ordeal when there is just one of you and a minivan's worth of stuff...

On a not very related note...

We are headed to the midwest soon for the Doll Family Reunion.  So if any family members want to pitch us to return to the homeland this is the time....

I feel ambivalent about the DFR and going home.  The Doll's are a family of introverts.  So it can be hard to have a conversation, but when you do, it is often quite meaning filled.  I find it hard to be surrounded by my Dad's siblings.  His death lurking unspoken around every corner...  I don't want to face some of the racism and evangelical Christianity in my family...but I also long for the intimacy of sharing history and discovering a shared set of values with cousins.

All in all I am trying to figure out what I am curious about for all of my family.  How will I explore these places I am curious about.  How will I deal with it when I encounter family that isn't so curious about me...

There is a phrase I run through my head on a regular basis. It is often the start (and end) of my silent prayer (it is also from a children's poem)..."Where are you going and what do you wish..."

In big ways we are asking questions.
So too in small ways.