Who am I if I barely accomplish a thing each day?
This is a serious question for me these days. Today, I did almost nothing except care for my children, put in a load of laundry, and wash the toilet. Which might be more than a lot of people. But it is much much less than I usually do.
I am a woman who cans 30 jars of tomatoes, reads a novel, cleans the bathroom, redecorates the house, and organizes the kids toys in an afternoon. I also am a woman who doesn't find these things stressful but enjoyable. I don't get upset with the people i Love because they get in the way of my tasks, My tasks are often something I invite them into.
But her, 4.5 months pregnant and I am stagnant in my ability to get tasks done. It is spiritually hard for me. It's some sort of identity crisis. Is this the new me? Is this the pregnancy me? Is their something deeper going on? Am I depressed? Am I lazy? Am I overly addicted to the internet? Do I need to come up with some more exciting projects? I don't really know.
I do know that some of it is pregnancy, after all getting projects done when I have a constant series of headaches, or when I can't seem to eat much but I don't have energy, these things are key...but it's hard. Harder than it seems. What if one of the things that gives you the most energy just disappeared? It's NOT that I am suffering. It's just that I am really confused....
This is a serious question for me these days. Today, I did almost nothing except care for my children, put in a load of laundry, and wash the toilet. Which might be more than a lot of people. But it is much much less than I usually do.
I am a woman who cans 30 jars of tomatoes, reads a novel, cleans the bathroom, redecorates the house, and organizes the kids toys in an afternoon. I also am a woman who doesn't find these things stressful but enjoyable. I don't get upset with the people i Love because they get in the way of my tasks, My tasks are often something I invite them into.
But her, 4.5 months pregnant and I am stagnant in my ability to get tasks done. It is spiritually hard for me. It's some sort of identity crisis. Is this the new me? Is this the pregnancy me? Is their something deeper going on? Am I depressed? Am I lazy? Am I overly addicted to the internet? Do I need to come up with some more exciting projects? I don't really know.
I do know that some of it is pregnancy, after all getting projects done when I have a constant series of headaches, or when I can't seem to eat much but I don't have energy, these things are key...but it's hard. Harder than it seems. What if one of the things that gives you the most energy just disappeared? It's NOT that I am suffering. It's just that I am really confused....
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