Miriam is almost 3.

Dear Miriam (Z, Zita, M.Z. Miriam Zita),

You are about to complete your 3rd year and we will celebrate your birthday.  A lot of bloggers write eloquent posts to their children on their birthdays.  But I never have the right words on the right days...but today I'm thinking a lot about who you are.  Maybe I am thinking about you more because you are giving us a run for our money here in the midst of potty training bootcamp!  But nonetheless, you are in my heart, mind and fingertips.

Miriam, months ago you became a middle child.  Perhaps you will develop into a good sharer, a peace maker, and whatever else middle children are known for, but right now you are a fierce and stubborn fighter.  A deep (profoundly deep feeler), and a classy lady who loves her fancy tights and cannot be seen in anything other than a skirt.

I said to Papa Sean the other night, during one of your meltdowns (you are two of course they happen a lot), "Hello Sean, welcome to me as a two year old." Oh sweet Miriam you are so much like me it is funny.  I often interact with you and I remember so clearly having the feelings you are having. I know so dearly the feeling of wanting praise and then being embarrassed when it arrives. I know the feeling of wanting privacy but fearing being left out.  I know your little spirit out of my instincts.  But even though we are similar we are not the same.  You are you.  You have your own things to sort out, your own feelings, your own journeys and stories and growing to do.  And I am not my Mom either.  We are creating a new.  Me and You and Junia and Papa and Tiny Tom (he won't always be so tiny).  Someday we will welcome new people in to this group..new partners...new friends...new others...always creating new.

Sometimes I fear that you will stay like you are forever.  Your 2/3 year old self is hard.  It is wild and all the things I listed above.  But I know you won't stay the same.  Right??  That's the guarantee of parenthood is that children are never stagnant...I trust you will push my buttons in various ways- forever. I trust that you will have strong feelings- forever ...but my sweet girl I am excited to see you keep growing.



I love how you bring your feelings and your fierceness as your world expands. I love your compassion for your pet worm.  I adore your rage when you fall. I yearn for you to hold on to your voice that so easily calls out justice and injustice (my turn, my plate, my choice)...

So as you turn three, I don't have a particular wish for you or a particular imparting phrase. Even though life in this family is sometimes chaotic, and that there are sometimes not enough ears to hear all our stories, and not enough laps for all our bottoms know that you are love.  Other than I love you. I love you.  Don't ever think for a minute that you are not seen, cared for and beloved.

-Your Mama Rachel