What now?
I must stop trying to write posts about moving. Every single one I write- and I probably have drafted 10 is this:
Moving is hard.
Here is why it is hard.
1.
2.
3.
This was the right decision here is why it was the right decision.
1.
2.
3.
I like house decorating and that makes me feel superfical but still...
Somehow even with all that I cannot manage to write a compelling post.
I have done several "snippets from the life of..." posts but even those I am not sure are worth reading.
What is a person if they do not have a job?
I am sitting in front of the computer typing this post mostly because I feel like I need some sort of practice. I am managing to do centering prayer a couple of times a week but I think since I am a bit of a writer this is practice I should try to focus on in this strange interim time.
I am a stay at home parent right now. I have no employment and bring in no income. I think that this compels me to discern. I am eager to jump into something new. I am full of fantasies about the next steps. Even as I write that, however, I know that I should not to such jumping. Thankfully the practicalities of childcare keep me tethered to home and from making that imaginative leave, but it is around.
Discern. Discern. Discern.
I joined this women's faith sharing group from a random parish right when we moved here. It is horrendous. I am going to quit. Tomorrow is our last meeting and if it doesn't get better I am out. I don't even want to get into it. The whole thing is dumb. It is also unethical too- giving away participants private information and such. It kills me
I wrote on facebook and instagram that I feel haunted by my old job. That my old work clothes or the handouts that my kids use as scrap paper jump out and draw me into an emotional space regarding work. Being laid off fucking suck. I don't know, but I suspect being laid of from a job you feel is a calling is even shittier. On the bright side, I am not able to be at home and not hustling at a job I hate (just so I don't feel too sorry for myself).
So that's that.
More soon.
Moving is hard.
Here is why it is hard.
1.
2.
3.
1.
2.
3.
I like house decorating and that makes me feel superfical but still...
Somehow even with all that I cannot manage to write a compelling post.
I have done several "snippets from the life of..." posts but even those I am not sure are worth reading.
What is a person if they do not have a job?
I am sitting in front of the computer typing this post mostly because I feel like I need some sort of practice. I am managing to do centering prayer a couple of times a week but I think since I am a bit of a writer this is practice I should try to focus on in this strange interim time.
I am a stay at home parent right now. I have no employment and bring in no income. I think that this compels me to discern. I am eager to jump into something new. I am full of fantasies about the next steps. Even as I write that, however, I know that I should not to such jumping. Thankfully the practicalities of childcare keep me tethered to home and from making that imaginative leave, but it is around.
Discern. Discern. Discern.
I joined this women's faith sharing group from a random parish right when we moved here. It is horrendous. I am going to quit. Tomorrow is our last meeting and if it doesn't get better I am out. I don't even want to get into it. The whole thing is dumb. It is also unethical too- giving away participants private information and such. It kills me
I wrote on facebook and instagram that I feel haunted by my old job. That my old work clothes or the handouts that my kids use as scrap paper jump out and draw me into an emotional space regarding work. Being laid off fucking suck. I don't know, but I suspect being laid of from a job you feel is a calling is even shittier. On the bright side, I am not able to be at home and not hustling at a job I hate (just so I don't feel too sorry for myself).
So that's that.
More soon.
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