Sewing failure: Why are patterns so confusing?

Today is a lousy day in sewing land. No the photo above isn't from today. The word lousy means that I am in no mood to take a picture of it.

I am not an idiot. I am no dumbass. But I find professional dress patterns to be very irritating. It seems like the more amateurs or homemade ones that I buy from etsy.com are easier. Except that the ones I buy from etsy.com are always for children. But really, the professional patterns are much more confusing. Whereas, a pattern that is made for amateurs like me uses simple English and might even have extra pictures knowing that a certain part is confusing or difficult. But seriously, this is the 3rd dress pattern I have tried and the 3rd dress that hasn't worked out so well.

Grrr.

Oh, and besides that, I am now trying to finish this dress, made from a sheet, that is not going to fit. I am half energized to finish it only to show the universe that I suck at sewing sometimes. But, I am thoroughly disappointed that it's not going to turn into a super cute dress for only $2.99 and some elbow grease. Now, it's just elbow grease all over everywhere...

Oh, and the super cute dress that is the top picture of this blog is my latest success. Or, I thought it was until I tried to put it on Junia and it won't go over her giant (19"!!!) head.