'Tis a gift to be simple

Why is gift giving and receiving rife with such feelings? Don't take this personally anyone, it is not a lack of gratitude it's that I'm learning something.

Sean and I attempt to live simply and attempt to spend money carefully and intentionally. But, I am not getting paid for maternity leave so that leaves me thinking A LOT about money. When I want a latte I've got to find a way to resist, when I think maybe I should get a yoga ball to use as a chair at work I've got to hold back, when I go to the U-district to wander around I realize that there's not much to do in retail district with no money, when our laundry detergent is running low I ponder if there are cheaper at home detergents to make or use.

Part of me thrives on this forced thriftiness. I love that if we have things we need we can ask ourselves if they sell it at goodwill, or figure out ways to go without. I love, eating through our cabinets before we go grocery shopping. I also believe that being worried about money is a (sad) reality of life and also a way to be in solidarity with the poor (many of whom are literally our neighbors). I love also finding creative ways to spruce up our house, our love for each other, and our daily lives with ordinary things and without money.

But, as finances are tight for this family I can't help but have a little ambivalence when people buy us baby gifts we don't need. Babies bring out the generosity in people. They also bring our our inner cuteness magnet (ie- cute stuff for baby equals money spent). But, so much of this stuff is just unnecessary or a luxury. Furthermore, just as people know the way to support new families is to offer babysitting (thank you Anne), meals (thank you Elana), and other community support (thank you all!) I am realizing how much economic and ordinary support can ease stress for young families (thank you MAC). After all, the friend who got me the breast pump (you know who you are) and the friends who got us the diaper service or friends who got us gift cards or the many people who DID get us essentials, they did not get us a baby cute gifts, or gifts that anyone at the shower oooh'd and ahhhh'd over (I confess that I like to give gifts that people at showers ooh and ahh over), but these like other such gifts are the ones that make it easier for Sean and I. So these are the lessons I'm learning from this. First, I will become a different gift giver to new parents (mixing the practical with the cute). Second, I have a new justice issue to get behind (paid maternity leave!).