Sometimes our place is a dump.

Right now our front yard looks kinda like this....

In addition to this their are an assundry of tools that keep getting unloaded from the wheelbarrow and then everytime I reload it something has been wandered off with, their are various piles of sticks that didn't make it into the stick chopper, the top of the sandbox has been removed and is leaning against something unless it has been tipped back over and walked over., there is some firewood that was once stacked and has now been dragged all over, their are newspapers and boxes all over the swampy area that will be our garden as I am happy to let these things turn into a natural compost, and our little pond if full of balls because our retriever is a bit of half-assed worker.

If we lived in suburbia our neighbors would hate us.  And, in fact, sometimes I take in the whole scene and I am kind of overwhelmed at how our yard or living room or play room, or bathroom, or kitchen all just look trashed.  Everything is a bit messy.

$200 of nice shrubs could really class up the front.
Putting away our bikes, tools, toys everytime would keep the front yard cleaner.
Putting more of our things in cabinets- toaster, mixer, would really clean up the look of the kitchen.
Creating better organization systems with toys (might) get the kids to put things away better.

I could do all of these things.
We could go on pintrest and figure out a bunch of systems and try them.
I could create a rewards system for picking things up and putting them away.

Except, my motivation for cleaning up is about what you think of me.
It is about that you judge me.
Or that you might judge me.
Or that you will come into my home and start cleaning instead of relax and let it be a home.

In my heart of hearts my real motivation is that sometimes I want to be lazy.
And tomorrow I don't mind if those ugly chairs are in the front yard- because we will play with them (even if they are ugly), and I don't care if the tricycle sits in the rain- because it rains a lot here and it is not worth scolding my kids for being kids.  And really, it doesn't matter if my house is messy, because I would rather have a messy house than spend the day yelling at my kids (don't get me wrong I spend enough time feeling like crap for my less than exemplar parenting skills).

So there, I've said it.


  1. The signs of living life instead of fearing life. I love you and your family, you make me want to live.


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